Being Your Own Best Friend

5 Steps to the Life You Want – Starting NOW

What are you doing in your life?  Are you happy, satisfied, energized?  Or are you feeling stuck, unhappy, feeling like there’s GOT to be something more?  Are you counting the days until your next vacation – six months, (or worse), a year away?

You have so many options, even when you can’t see anything but more of the same old, same old.  And it’s possible – more than you have ever imagined!  YOU are the author of your destiny.  So what story are you writing?

 Yes, I meant that.   What story are you writing?  Is your life the story of someone who never achieves their heart’s desire?  The story of someone who can’t seem to figure out their passion or purpose?  The story of someone who just can’t stop feeling (or believing) they’re not good enough?  Because you are writing your story, every day.

 Sure, we all go through challenging times.  Often we have had experiences that are really crappy, sometimes experiences that totally suck.  But those are circumstances, not the story.  The story that you weave around your experiences – that’s totally up to you.

 You know how some people seem to flourish and thrive, even through the most horrific situations?  While other people stumble and fall, hard, when there’s a bump in the road or a detour from the path?  Does that seem to be just a matter of chance?

 It’s not.  People who flourish, who thrive, even when the crap is flying out of the fan, are the people who are taking charge of their story.  These are the people who have decided that they are going to write a journey, an outcome, that isn’t determined by the way the situation appears.

 One of the most robust findings from the last decade of positive psychology has been the power of gratitude.  The amazing changes in perspective that occur when someone focuses on appreciating what has gone well, and finds at least 3 good things in each day.  That’s a small number of items, but sometimes it can seem almost impossible.

 The key is – it’s absolutely possible.  Simply because you are the author of your own destiny.  You get to write the story of your life – the story of each day.  You get to decide whether or not you are going to see the areas of gratitude or focus on what isn’t working the way you want.  Every circumstance, and I do mean every circumstance, has something to teach us, something to learn from.  And each situation, every day, is an opportunity to learn, to grow, and to move forward in creating the life you want to live.

 “Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, maybe you should set up a life you don’t need to escape from.” — Seth Godin

 So how about it?  Are you ready (and willing) to start creating the life you want?  To write the story of a life that you are committed to living? To live a life that involves vacations because they are fun, rather than as an escape from your life?

 Here are the steps you can take, right now:

  1. Every day, identify at least 3 good things that you are grateful for, in that day
  2. Take time to breathe, really breathe, at least 3 times a day
  3. Ask yourself: “What can I learn from this situation?”
  4. At least once a day, consider your perspective: “How can I see this situation, this day, from the perspective of the life I want to live?”
  5. Identify the story that you are telling about your life – and make sure it’s the story you want to live!

Write the story of wonderful, amazing, happy you!

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